Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
Randomize
