OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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