100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
