god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
