So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
mondays should just be called national damage control day
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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