This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
