hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
