This is not my ceiling
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
