I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize