Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Randomize
