oh god the rape fog is back!
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
