So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize