god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
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