scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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