i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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