i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
