i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
