Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
Randomize
