just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
