I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
My gut is currently telling me that Jesus did not intend for us to eat shrimp pad thai on Easter
Is this a considering it or regretting it text?
I just shit out what feels like an entire shrimp with claws and all. You tell me.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
