Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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