Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Randomize
