I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Randomize
