And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
She bit a glass in half.
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
