okay pat passed out under dana's car
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
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