when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Randomize