yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
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