I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
Randomize
