ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
