Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize