Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
