Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
