This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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