Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
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