I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
he was CRYING into my vagina
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Randomize
