There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
