So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
This is classic penis vs brain.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize
