Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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