come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
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