Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
