I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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