So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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