If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Mom said you looked used
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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