I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Randomize
