Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
