the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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