Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
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