So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
