If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Randomize