Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
